How to Stop Illegal ImmigrationApr 07, 2006

Ductape Fatwa

Every day, more illegal aliens pour across the border. It’s a war, but it’s a war Americans can win. It’s time to stop depending on the government and take things into the hands of real American citizens. The government can’t do it without your help. Nothing worthwhile is easy, but illegal immigration can be stopped if every American will follow these simple steps:

When you eat lunch or dinner in a restaurant, whatever your bill is, do not pay the waitperson. Insist that the manager be called, and give him four times the amount of the bill, so that he will be able to hire Americans.

Do the same thing with everything you buy. Some stores, especially the large chains like Wal-Mart, may hesitate to take the extra money. Ask to see the manager, and if necessary, leave the money on top of the cash register. Then you’ve fulfilled your responsibility to make sure that store has the money to hire real Americans and only deal with other businesses that do the same.

These illegal aliens are coming to the US for one thing: to take American jobs.

It is up to Americans to make sure those jobs are already taken. Let that begin with you. Take a second job. If you work 9 to 5, you can obtain evening employment in a restaurant kitchen. Make sure they understand that you are willing to work for the same wage the illegal aliens are getting. That may be less than the minimum wage, but that’s OK with you. Be willing to forego any benefits, and work overtime as needed. If you work evenings, take a morning job doing construction cleanup, or landscaping. These jobs can be obtained easily by going to convenience or home improvement store parking lots just before dawn. There will be many illegal aliens there, and your presence and willingness to work hard, even if you only receive twenty or thirty dollars for an eight hour shift of physical labor, will ensure that one Mexican will not get a job that day, a job that is your birthright as a real American.

Tell your current boss that you wish your salary decreased by 75% to enable him to hire real Americans to clean the offices and work in the cafeteria, and to send more money to Washington to hire more soldiers to keep out illegal aliens.

If you want to beat these illegals at their own game, you have to use their methods. Now that you have taken a job away from one of them, and done your part to help your own employer hire real Americans and pay your share of the cost of keeping them out, you will be ready to learn more of their secrets and use them to fight and win this war.

If you own a home, sell it, and send the proceeds to the government to pay for increased troops at the border, and to build a wall like Israel’s Peace Fence.

You may wonder, how do these illegal aliens work such long hours for such low pay, no overtime, no benefits, and still manage to send money out of the country to bring in more illegal aliens.

These aliens are sneaky. But you can be just as sneaky. Do as they do and beat them at their own game.

Get together with ten or twelve relatives, neighbors or like-minded people who are also committed to winning the war against illegal immigration, and rent the cheapest one bedroom apartment you can find in your city or town. In most areas, the rent for the apartment will be under $1000. Even if you share with only nine roommates, that means your share of the rent is only $100 or less!

Don’t worry about furniture, you’ll need that space for everyone to have room to sleep. Used blankets can be gotten at a Goodwill or other thrift store for very little money. You’re a soldier on a critical mission, and this is your barracks!

Now you are catching on to their strategy. You can cut expenses even more by not having the electricity connected if you choose an apartment with a gas stove. Or you can cook outdoors, like some wily illegals do, in order to send even MORE American money out of the country. That’s not what you’ll do, though. You will send your extra money straight to Washington, to help build that fence and secure America’s borders.

You and your roommates are in for a shock when you find out just how little money a large sack of beans costs. And depending on which Mexican grocery store you go to, the “masa” for tortillas may cost even less than that! Of course, you can buy already made tortillas, but they will cost more, and the real pros at the illegal alien game know that. As an American you are naturally smart enough to know that every dollar you save can save your country, so you buy the masa and make the tortillas yourself. Don’t worry if after a few weeks, even a few days, you feel even angrier about the problem of illegal immigration when you find out just how far a big pot of beans will go, even shared with nine other people, and the sack is still almost full! And the same goes for the masa. Yes, this is how those illegal aliens do it. Beans and tortillas, every day. That’s one of their key strategies, and now it is one of yours, too.

It may be that your new lifestyle as a soldier in the war against illegal immigration makes it impractical for you to continue in your former job. Don’t worry about that. Those aren’t the jobs the illegals are after. You can be pretty sure that your replacement will be an honest-to-goodness English-speaking American. Now you have eight hours free that you can use to take another job away from another illegal alien!

In the spring and summer months, if you play your cards right, you just might be able to move into the agricultural sector, a hotbed of illegals, and get plenty of time in the fresh air helping with the important work of America’s harvest - a job for Americans if there ever was one, and as you reach for another orange in the bright sunshine of beautiful Florida or crouch with your sack the in the onion fields of south Georgia, whether you get paid or not, what greater reward could a solider in this battle ask for than the knowledge that some Jose or Pedro was told, “sorry, we don’t need any more pickers,” because YOU, a real American, are doing the picking!

If every American will follow these simple steps, illegal immigration can be stopped. Not cut in half, not dressed up in some fancy amnesty program, but STOPPED!

Remember they come for the jobs. If those jobs are already taken by Americans, they won’t come.

So don’t waste time! Start right now! Get that second job at a restaurant, or maybe a warehouse, and talk to your boss. If he refuses to cut your salary by 75% as you ask, then you send the money to Washington yourself. There are 2000 miles of border to be fenced and manned while you recruit other solders for this vital war.

But this is a war Americans can WIN!